twenty days.

i'm reading survivor right now. it's a palahniuk book. i've read it once before and i enjoyed it. i just realize why i need to take time between my bouts of palahniuk ingestion. yes, the man is a genius. yes, his writing provokes more thought in me than any other writing ever has or will. but it's all the truth. and we all know that nobody wants to hear the whole truth about anything. if you're out there looking all indignant, saying that you do want the truth, then start by being honest with yourself. you don't really want to know if you look fat in that dress. or if you're ugly. or if you annoy everyone around you. we ask those things so that people will tell us we aren't those things. that we look fabulous in that dress and we're beautiful and that everyone loves us. don't lie, it's true. so when you're reading palahniuk and he's telling you about the rush some people get from murder or the smell of someone's head after you just shot a bullet through it or the humiliation some men go through just to masturbate, you have to remind yourself it isn't just a story. this is real stuff. these things actually happen. and i get a real kick out of knowing that there is someone out there who's brave enough to write it all down. who has no problem making people feel uncomfortable. chuck palahniuk is a visionary. i suggest you open your mind a little bit, no matter how difficult it is to hear. because once you get over that hurdle, just about anything is possible. and hey, i bet you're beautiful. i think you are.