Saturday, May 8, 2010

not feeling so hot.

i think, mentally, today is going to be a good day. i woke up at a decent hour, i'm with dawn, surrounded by family, we're going to take my cousin a dress so i get to visit her, dawn got a new phone that i'm in love with and that she's letting me use to text my dear friends. but physically i'm not too well. my ankle kills, first of all. i think maybe i should stop walking on it normally. because that hurts when i do that, and yet i still do. no, it's not some weirdo form of masochism. it's more of a pride thing. like, "oh yeah, i sprained my ankle again. but it's not so bad this time." even though i actually think it might be the worst this time. you'd think i'd realize it's not going to heal unless i start to treat myself with respect. but how about you let me know when the sky turns purple and i'll let you know that i respect myself? more importantly, on the physical thing, i'm feeling nauseous again. i woke up around eight and got dressed and felt completely ill, so i thought i'd lay down again and sleep it off. well, i just had a few hours of fevered sleep in which i slept on my ankle funny, worsening it's pain, and when i woke up i felt just as nauseous if not moreso. i don't want to throw up today. i'm tired of it. i just want a nice, pleasant day. what's wrong with me? seriously. but last night i made a really beautiful marble cake that i let cool over night. i was going to try it today but, lo and behold, i can't stomach anything. everyone told me it was bitching though. so i'm proud of myself. something else i thought was funny, jordan and i walked up to the store the other day and we were sharing my ipod and after a while she ripped the headphone out of her ear. i said, "jordan. why did you do that?" and she said, "you listen to the weirdest crap that no one's ever heard of. i'm not in the mood." i felt accomplished then. btw david, i don't know if you'll read this but i appreciated coffee yesterday and had an absolutely splendid time. definitely zero on the pants scale. :P okay, well i love you all. and i was thinking yesterday, all of the people i love are incredibly beautiful, intelligent, and just all around attractive people. i hope you're one of them, for your sake. lots of assorted kisses.

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